An Open Letter to Parents: Let’s Rethink What We’re Teaching Our Children

An Open Letter to Parents: Let’s Rethink What We’re Teaching Our Children

Dear Parents,

As the holiday season approaches and another year of birthdays, recitals, and celebrations comes to a close, I feel compelled to speak openly and honestly about something I’ve observed—and something that deeply concerns me.

We live in a culture where everything has become a competition. Birthday parties are no longer about gathering friends to celebrate; they’re measured by the extravagance of themed decorations and perfectly curated gift bags. Participation in sports or recitals comes with an expectation of material rewards rather than the experience being the reward itself. And Christmas…oh, Christmas has turned into a tidal wave of excess, where our homes become overrun with items that, within weeks, will be forgotten, broken, or donated.

It’s not just about the clutter (though as someone who helps families declutter for a living, I see the fallout firsthand). What I see—and what breaks my heart—is the emotional and mental toll this cycle is taking on parents and children alike.

Why Are We Doing This?

The hard truth is that overconsumption often has little to do with our children. Instead, it reflects our own insecurities. Whether it’s a desire to outshine others, to fit in, or to fill voids within ourselves, the driving force behind all this excess isn’t always love for our kids—it’s the pressure we feel to measure up.

But at what cost?

Children raised in an environment of “more, more, more” often grow up valuing things over experiences, quantity over quality. They can’t truly appreciate the meaning of a simple, heartfelt gift when they’ve always been handed so much. And let’s be honest with ourselves: as adults, we’re no different. None of us truly values what we have too much of.

It’s Not Sustainable—for Our Homes or Our Mental Health

I’ve spoken to countless moms who feel defeated because they can’t “keep up.” They see the Instagram-worthy parties, the endless toys under the tree, and feel like failures for not doing the same. But here’s the truth: the more we chase these unattainable standards, the more we rob ourselves—and our children—of what truly matters.

When we strip away the excess, we see that the greatest gifts we can give our children aren’t material things. They’re love, connection, values, and the ability to find joy in simplicity. These are the lessons that prepare them for adulthood.

It’s Time to Stand Up for Our Kids

This holiday season, I urge all of us to pause and reflect. Before buying another toy or planning another elaborate event, ask yourself:

• What am I teaching my child with this?

• Am I filling a need for them—or for me?

• How can I show them that life’s greatest rewards aren’t found in things but in relationships, experiences, and gratitude?

Be the parent who says “enough.” Be the one who teaches your children that their worth isn’t tied to material possessions or extravagant gestures. Let’s give them the tools they need to thrive as adults—with mental health, self-worth, and gratitude intact.

This isn’t about guilt or blame; it’s about awareness and change. Let’s create a better world for the adults our children will one day become.

With love and hope,

Ericka Peake

OCD Home Solutions